It’s only been a month since returning to work, and the time has flown! I seem to be doing alright at 3 hours a day, but some days are just harder than others. There have been a few days where I have woken up and thought “fuck me, the struggle is gonna be real today” – however, after I throw a strong coffee down my throat and have a pep talk to myself I have managed to drag my ass out of bed, log in and be productive for 3 hours (thank god my colleagues can’t actually see me)…

I have to admit it’s nice to feel like I’m contributing to society again! I’ve had to put the book writing on the back burner for a little while… but I’m still gonna do it.. Two chapters down…

Work, smerk… how have I been travelling otherwise? Scars are healing, hair is growing (although I’m not allowed to colour it for another 8 months), and I’m building more and more stamina.

The hair colour thing… I’m coping with the ash (grey) blonde thing thing… but damn I want to lighten it up a bit! This is not the fifty shades of grey moment I want in my life!

As for the stamina? Thank god it’s coming back! Since giving up smoking in September last year and undergoing six surgeries since December, I have stacked on the weight! Lying in a hospital bed for 45 days and only managing to walk for extremely short distances (bed-lounge-bed) hasn’t helped the situation.

I’ve always been happy to be on the chubby side, but with the grey hair, battered body and extra weight, I’m just not feeling the love for myself. Plus, some of my clothes are just a wee bit tighter than I’d like. So after being inspired by Val, I’ve decided to put myself on a diet! OMG! I’m scared!! So scared in fact, that I’ve had to delay the start date! How will I cope without all the things I love to eat! Arrggghhh…

I don’t want to lose heaps of weight. I just wanna be closer to my pre surgery/ pre not smoking weight.

The weight loss plan I’ve decided to try is called the Ph@tt diet… yes I am now officially a phattie!! I have a mentor and a strong support group, so here’s hoping this works!

Not much else to report at this stage… I’ll keep you posted on my weight loss journey!